Being unconditional

A lesson I've been learning as of late is "being unconditional."


Thinking of my dad, I never hear him say, "I've been paying your cell-phone bill, now what are you going to do for me?" He doesn't, because it's a gift--not a responsibility--from him. He does it willingly for us. He doesn't do it to play us like pawns or to somehow expect something (i.e., obedience) of us. He just does it and doesn't think twice about it.

Another example that has required a lifetime for my slow brain to understand is being unconditional in the same way. If I think that I've been patient with someone about criticisms, for example, then I would expect the same kind of forbearance and patience as I felt I have been exercising, at my turn of whipping out criticisms. But NO, this is not the case. That is not love. I cannot expect someone to treat me the same way that I feel I have been treating them, because that means I'm holding my perceived "righteousness" against them. What I mean by this is, I shouldn't feel entitled to righteousness, goodness, or what have you, because I've given these.


This is what love is: Not keeping a record of others' "wrongs." And especially for me, not keeping a record of my "rights" that I will use against others.

Ugh. Lesson I'm still learning.


We are forever indebted to Christ. And as long as we make Him our center, forgiving and letting go of our wants/entitlements becomes easier. Because we deserve so much worse.

We essentially gave up our rights when we decided to follow Jesus.

I love Luke 18:10-14, which compares the prayer of the Pharisee with that of the tax collector. As believers, we need to make sure that our focus is vertical and not lateral. Focusing on our position compared to God's rather than our position compared to those around us. Immeasurable disparity rather than finite technicalities.


So if my dad gives from his heart, or if I bear with someone, neither of us should expect anything back. Both should just think about loving that person. End of story. We don't have the right to even think that we deserve anything. Understanding our indebtedness to Jesus should help with that. And Jesus doesn't demand anything from us. He gives us a choice.
It should play the same way with us.

And my favorite verse of all time,

"Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law." (Romans 14:8)


Always indebted. I love that. It's freeing.